Coaching or Therapy?

After 15 years as a therapist working with both adults and children with serious issues and difficulties, I'm very clear about the difference between therapy and coaching and the advantages of each.
A therapeutic approach has to focus on people's problems and their past; any diagnosis is of the person's problems, not their strengths. Sometimes people are referred to as "patients" giving power and responsibility to the therapist, not the client. For a minority of people, therapy is tremendously helpful, they need this time to untangle and release themselves from damage done to them in their pasts. For most people however this is simply not necessary, focussing on hurts and failures can actually increase their importance and power, and this is often unhelpful.
A coaching approach encourages you to look forward, to focus on what you can achieve, to plan, set and meet goals, look for solutions and to be positive. I believe that we create our own reality; that if we smile at people they will (on the whole) smile back, if we are friendly and positive towards them, people will respond in the same way, making our path through life much easier and pleasant. On the other hand, if we are grumpy and expect the worst from people, we will find evidence for that as we go through life, and not many people will go out of their way to help us.
Simply put, a coaching approach looks forward and focuses on solutions.
Although I have the skills and experience to work as a therapist, if I believe you need therapeutic help I will refer you to someone else for that.
I believe that change, whilst not always easy to accomplish, is very simple, often as simple as changing our mind, sometimes, it actually is easy, and it is always rewarding and fun.

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More of What to expect

I will be demanding of you. I make no excuses about this; I don't believe it helps people to allow them to make excuses for themselves or to wriggle out of commitments made to me or to themselves.
I will see you as strong, a capable individual, not someone with issues and problems.
I will assume that you have chosen to work with me because you want to make real changes in your life, and the lives of your family members, so I will expect action and commitment from you.
I will support you every step of the way, but I will not be soft on you or mollycoddle you.
My expectations of you will be high, because only if I expect your best, will you be motivated to achieve it.

The Effective Response Silver Service

Breath Work

We all know how to breathe. Don't we?
Actually, no, many of us breathe from the top of our chests, not taking the oxygen fully into our lungs. This starves your system of oxygen, which means you're stressing your body, and depriving yourself of vital energy.
Additionally, in a panic attack people breathe from the top of their chest only. If you are doing this, whether it is because of anxiety or actual panic, your body will think there is reason to panic, which will increase your feelings of stress.

Proper breathing is very simple and easy to learn.
By paying attention to your breath and practicing correct breathing you will be providing your body with more oxygen and vital energy. This in itself reduces stress, but if you know how to breathe properly and you encounter a stressful situation, you will notice your breathing pattern alter. This means that you are alerted to the situation and your reaction to it. You will notice if you have begun to breathe from the top of your chest only, and can introduce a more effective breathing pattern. This will make you instantly feel better. You will feel more in control and you will be able to respond to the stressful situation more calmly.
Effective breathing techniques will:

• Make you feel better on a day-to-day level
• Provide your body with more oxygen, improving your energy levels.
• Help reduce and control stress.
• Increased oxygen helps cell regeneration; that means, it helps slow down the aging process. Cheaper and more effective than surgery.
  

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The Effective Response Gold Service

Visualisation, also known as guided meditation.

Visualisation is an extremely effective way of working with our unconscious mind. Our unconscious cannot distinguish between actual reality and what we believe to be true. Our false and limiting beliefs about the world and ourselves live in our unconscious; it therefore makes sense to work directly with our unconscious minds to change those false and limiting beliefs into positive helpful ones.
I use visualisation to make this process easier, quicker and more thorough.
I also use visualisation to enable you to develop a stronger sense of the "new improved you", to help you to increase your self-belief and confidence, and most importantly to enable you to contact your dreams, and develop them into a stronger reality.
Everyone I work with loves using visualisations.

Laughter

I have a good sense of humour, even when I was working as a therapist and the going was tough, there was a lot of laughter in my sessions.

"Aha" moments are often accompanied by laughter. It can make a point, help illustrate something, defuse fears and point out the irony of situations and patterns we get ourselves into, often they are ridiculous. I believe that humour helps us to learn, remember, grow and take on things, which might otherwise be daunting.

This is how I will be coaching you so you can develop your most

Effective Response.

I will ask you to sign a contract or code of conduct; this outlines for you the 'rules' of the coaching relationship; what is expected of you.
In return I will forward to you my "promise document", this is my promise of how I will conduct myself towards you as your life coach.
I will ask for a brief life history, outlining major events in your life, your expectations, beliefs, what you like about yourself, difficulties in your family you'd like to address and what you'd like to change.
We will have our regular phone sessions in which together, we will identify the obstacles in your life and work out strategies that feel comfortable, for you to remove them from your life.
You will tell me how much you've achieved and I will support you to continue with this. If progress feels difficult, we will identify what's holding you back and how to overcome it.
I will set you 'inter-session tasks'; homework, assignments, challenges, and I will expect you to accomplish them by our next session.
I will use visualisation to enable you to clarify your dreams, goals and intentions, to strengthen your

self-belief and confidence and to enable you to perceive things more positively.
You will progress, step by step towards your intended goals and dreams. As you successfully complete each stage of your plans, your confidence and self-belief will increase, your "new self" will become stronger and you will find that

you are becoming the person you want to be.
Life coaching is about removing the obstacles that are preventing you from accomplishing your dreams and achieving your potential. I will encourage you in this until you have sufficient self-belief and confidence to go it alone.

If you just want to learn some breath work, we will contract for the Effective Response Silver Service in the beginning. Most people just need one session to learn the techniques, but it's common to have a follow up a few weeks later to refine them and make sure everything is working perfectly.